Don’t get me wrong – the Hurtigruten (“Fast Route”) cruise up the Norwegian Coast from Bergen to the Russian border at Kirkenes, is a great trip which deserves its place in a list of “100 things you should do before your die”. The scenery is amazing. You get enough time on shore to get the flavour of beautiful small cities like Tromso and Trondheim. The boat hugs the coast most of the time, and visits small scenic outposts at random times during the day and night at, where it drops off mail, supplies and the occasional Norwegian traveller. You travel way north of the Arctic Circle. You get the chance to visit the Lofoten Islands and drink reindeer soup with the Sami. The boat has comfortable lounge areas with panoramic views, and the food onboard is good. Overall, it is a great experience.

Lighthouse near Lofoten Islands

The trip lacks many of the usual features of a cruise. There is no casino, there are no song and dance shows, and there is no Captain’s champagne reception or formal dining night. These are all things I am happy to live without. I can also manage to fold down my own bed at night and fluff my own duvet. There is no official photographer to point a lens at you every time you enter or leave the ship, or put a bite of food to your mouth, which is a pleasant relief!

However, there are two significant annoyances which make it clear that Hurtigruten rates maximizing profits and keeping to its pre-ordained schedule above service to the paying passengers.

The first annoyance is the handling of beverages. Even if you have paid in advance the cost of full board, you still need to pay extra if you want to drink water or coffee on board! There is free and unlimited water, juice and coffee at the breakfast buffet, but at lunch there is nothing unless you have a package or buy a drink. At dinner time, there are no free drinks during the meal, but there is free coffee in the lounge for one hour after the meal.

When you board in Bergen you have to line up to pay for your choice of beverage service. Hurtigruten offers water, coffee, beer and wine packages. The water package costs 245 NOK (about 4$0 Canadian) and provides passengers with  a 500ml bottle of still or sparkling water with lunch and dinner. The beer package is 400mls of beer with lunch and dinner. The wine package I thought was too expensive to consider, even though it includes free water. The coffee package supplies you with a re-useable mug which you can fill as often as you like from coffee dispensers around the ship. It is almost compulsory to take the water package, as they prevent people from bringing their own water into the dining room. The coffee package can be avoided if you can last from breakfast to after dinner without coffee, or if you bring an immersion heater to plug in and boil your own cup of water. My wife did this, but the device caught fire in a spectacular fashion after two days. She then managed to find a source of hot water which she would bring back to our cabin.

If you are not a big drinker, you can bring a couple of bottles of wine onboard with you and have a pre or post dinner drink in your cabin, or you can buy a coke from the bar and discretely add rum from a hip flask. We are not complete cheapskates and did treat our dining table to a round of post-dinner drinks in the bar, and they kindly reciprocated by buying a bottle of wine for our table on the last night. On previous cruises a drinks package meant as much alcohol as you can drink. Water and coffee were considered as necessities of life and freely available at all mealtimes.

Nordenorge on Honningsvag

The drinks issue was annoying, but it could be got around with a combination of money and ingenuity. The other issue was the time we had in ports, for which there was no remedy.
Hurtigruten began as a postal delivery service, and only gradually morphed into something closely resembling a modern cruise ship, but sometimes its heritage shows in an unfortunate way. When you book the trip you should be aware that the boat makes a lot of short stops to deliver the post and supplies to various communities along the way. These stops can be as short as 5 minutes, but are typically 15 – 45 minutes, just enough time to get of the boat, look at the harbour, wander the length of the main street of a village community, and get back on board. Even at cities such as Tromso and Trondheim, the boat only stops for three or four hours. It leaves exactly on time, so you better be back on board, unless you are with an excursion arranged through Hurtigruten, in which case the boat will wait for you.

Trondheim

The stops in ports are already very short, but if the boat arrives late it cuts the shore time down, and leaves on time. On our northbound trip on the Nordenorge, which left Bergen on August 22nd 2015, we were late arriving at four successive ports. At Alesund we got 30 minutes ashore instead of 45, at Molde it was 15 minutes instead of 30, and at Trondheim we again arrived 15 minutes late. I complained and was told to email “feedback @hurtigruten.com”. I did so, and by way of response I got an email telling ne fill out a report on a web page. I did not get any actual response from any human, or even any relevant automated response. The following morning I got up to see Ornes, which was meant to be a 15 minute stop. We arrived 15 minutes late and dropped off a few passengers who were leaving the ship there, but then I was told: “It’s the Captain’s orders, I cannot let you off”.

This was getting to be annoying, so I went to the information desk to complain again. The officer was most displeased with my suggestion that Hurtigruten, a shipping line known for its punctuality, was not keeping to its own schedule. He insisted that I was incorrect, and that the ship had left every port exactly on time. He blamed the late arrivals on issues such as the tides in the Geiranger fjord and the need to take on more packages than usual at one of the ports we had visited the previous night. I said that these were operational issues for the crew to deal with, not something which should detract from the experience of the passengers. As he was unmoved by my complaint, I asked if I could speak directly to the Captain. After some discussion it was agreed that if I came back in six minutes I could have ten minutes of the captain’s time. At the appointed time I was escorted onto the bridge to meet Captain Asbjorn Dalan.

Asbjorn Dalan, Captain of Nordnorge

I began by thanking the Captain for taking the time to see me. I offered my hand, and he shook it reluctantly, letting go as soon as he could. I explained my issue and was amazed by his immediate response: “What makes you so special?” I explained that I was a paying passenger, that a few of us were concerned about this issue, and that I had taken the time and trouble to raise it with him. He then accused me of talking to the other passengers, as if this was a crime like fomenting rebellion. He asked why he should have to alter his plans for my convenience. I replied that I was not asking him to change anything, just to keep to the schedule which I had read before booking the trip. I suggested that if there were delays due to loading cargo the time should be made up during the many hours at sea, rather than by further cutting back the already short time passengers could spend in ports. He asked me if I knew how many additional tonnes of fuel it would take to do this. He added that he had nothing to apologize for, he was just doing his job.

I explained that I would have liked to have had a chance to step ashore at Ornes, but he had ordered the gangway staff not to let any tourists off. He said that there was not enough time to let all 400 passengers off and get them all back on there, and I replied that there were only two of us who wanted to get out. He then changed tacks and said he was not altering his plans for two people, and I re-iterated that I was not asking him to change any plans, merely to keep to his published schedule. He then said that there was nothing to see at Ornes anyway. I said it seemed like a pretty little fishing village, and he retorted that “They don’t fish there!” as if not fishing was a crime in Norway.

Small coastal town

Clearly I was getting nowhere by examining the past, so I asked how the rest of the trip looked, and if, given the excellent weather, he anticipated arriving in ports on schedule in future. The Captain was unwilling even to throw me a bone by saying offering a platitude and saying he would do his best. Instead just offered an enigmatic comment about having to wait and see how events unfold.

Having got no-where with my complaint I asked if, as I was up on the bridge with him anyway, he could give me a quick tour. He said that this was forbidden, and that I had to leave now. He then marched off the bridge, clearly expecting that I would follow. I waited a couple of minutes, took a photo, and followed the Captain downstairs.

There are many good things to be said about Hurtigruten. It offers a clean, comfortable, efficient and reliable service in a beautiful part of the world. I greatly appreciated the free WiFi which was available in the public areas of decks four and seven, and which worked reliably throughout most of the voyage. However, charging passengers for water and cutting back on time in port to keep on schedule without the expense of using extra fuel, suggest that maximising profits and keeping to their schedule are more important than caring for their paying passengers. They have not fully completed their own voyage from a being a delivery service to being a passenger-focused modern cruise line.

Cruising in Geiranger Fjord